I need help with a friend.

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thread starter MichaeIJackson Apr 24 2010 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

BEFORE READING: If you have time to read this, I would appreciate if you did. I can't believe I'm going to basil for this, but I might get a few serious responses, and a few laughs from the joking ones, so here. I am having huge issues with a friend. When we met a long time ago, he was a very nice person and we became fast friends. We only became better friends as time went on, but a year after I met him, he started being a lot worse... Now I understand I am far from perfect myself, but I try, and I do not pick up these bad habits. He became about the opposite of an ideal friend to me. (Just specifying this in advance, we are far from popular, and we are nerds, proud of it too.) Anyways, he began to lie a LOT. Now, telling a lie is something we all do, but I mean a LOT. It is saddening to watch as the majority of his sentances are lies now, and it seems he has totally lost the ability to tell the truth. He lies about everything in an attempt to be accepted by people, and be looked up to. Many people do not think this happens, but it does. Now that he lies so much, he has convinced himself these lies are true, and that he is the best person around. He has developed a huge ego, and honestly, he just makes a fool of himself. He thinks he is best at everything, I am not kidding at all. He literally feels he is the very best at EVERYTHING. Now, he certainly learns when he competes, he is far from best, but he just blames it on other things. He claims it's his asthma. He has a incredibly minor case of asthma, and he again lies saying it is major and he is breathing off 10% of what we are (obviously far from true.) When he loses, to support his big ego, he has to resort to lying MORE, and on top of this, to make himself feel better, he verbally abuses others, and puts people down. This has gotten extreme enough that it doesn't matter if it's his friends, he will put us down. When we finish a test, we ask around about grades. He always says 100%, and will never show us his tests. Once when his backpack fell, his test folder fell out and he didn't notice. He walked off and (not knowing what it was) looked through it. His 70-88%'s were far from 100%, and I'm thinking he is lying in an attempt to be accepted by us (we are all getting approximately 95+.) Another awful habit he has picked up is cheating. He cheats every time he can on everything. He cheats on tests, he tries to copy off people on work, and because of his big ego, he feels he is earning these grades. Of course, it shows on the tests, he isn't learning anything. Here is another awful thing. I do not want to mention all these things to other people, because I don't want to be mean. If he cheats, so be it. Once he is applying for scholarships, if he gets accepted into a good college, he's screwing himself. Once they find out he isn't capable of doing what all these papers say he can, he isn't going to pass. He's setting himself up for failure. Lying won't get you anywhere in life. When he's worki

vocalLen 04/24/10 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

leave him. there are better friends in the world

My Characters: xskymarcusx - 46 Galicia Archer

MichaeIJackson 04/24/10 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

I intend on doing so (at least temporarily.) But I can't help but still feel the attachment I did so many years back... Although I will. It should teach him humility.

Oogendune + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

Well, look, people who cheat are helping themselves only sort-term.. when it's all said and done, it's going to hurt. He doesn't understand what "hard work" is and in the future he won't be able to do the work that is required to earn a degree. If he can't think for himself or discipline himself, there is no way he could get through college.. He's just another worthless person. Throughout my life, there have been friends that had "fallen" out .. that stuff just happens with people. And if you don't want to be around him, no one wants to be around him. Surround yourself with only people who are going to lift you higher. Everything that you said here is right... you sound like you are getting ready to apply to college soon, and you two will most likely part ways. Leaving high school, for me, was wonderful. I left behind all of the failures, losers, and lazy people. You seem intelligent and determined, good luck.

My Characters: Oogendune - 107 Scania Crusader

Bolt 04/24/10 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

long story, but um ya you and other friends of his should just stop hanging out with him, if he asks why your all ignoring him outright tell him what you think, tell him that he's become a huge ***hole and does nothing but lie to feel accepted and explain that he doesn't have to do that and you want the old him back, the one without the ego back when you started hanging out. the way he was in the first place that got you to be his friend.

My Characters: BoltgodTg - 100 Bera I/L Mage

orbitwhite 04/24/10 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

Stick with him and you'll be screwed in the future.

My Characters: PinoyFrogger - 67 Broa Bandit

MichaeIJackson 04/24/10 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

Ok. I think this thread has given me some advice I'll try. I have a good group of friends that are good people. I'll migrate over there with my current friends. Thanks for the responses people!

Missy 04/24/10 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

Confront him about it!

My Characters: Adelphirexia - 30 Bera Evan 3rd Growth

MichaeIJackson 04/24/10 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

I'd hate to say, but at this point, confronting him might make things worse... He would claim he isn't doing any of these things, and deny it all, but if necessary, I am not afraid to confront him. If it gets even the smallest amount worse, or things don't change, that is certainly the next step.

LegendClark 04/24/10 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

Verbally abuse him.

My Characters: zzCLARKzz - 65 Scania Assassin

Shirlox 04/24/10 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

Wow.. That was long LOL I have the same problem with a friend of mine too. She use to my best friend from grade 5, til she started all her lies >__> And she even stole money from me, she got caught of course. Asking her why, she didn't answer and ran off. And then in Jr.High, she knew my locker comb, and with another best friend of mine, went into it, telling my 2nd one that I allow her to take as much money from my wallet anytime, luckily I had all my money on me that day. I know she lies and I tell her to stop, she of course denies it. But ahem. So even now, she lies so much just for attention. In the end I just stopped caring about her. I rarely talk to her now. Actually, I don't even consider her as my friend no more. I think you should just ignore him. You probably have better friends You could talk to him about it but.. I don't it'd change anything, since he's gotten so use to his lying habit. Good luck though

My Characters: shiriox - 80 Scania Hermit

MichaeIJackson 04/24/10 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

Thanks for the help Shirlox! It is great to receive help from someone who's been through the same thing. It's terrible to see someone you knew as a good friend for so long turn into something awful... It certainly is painful to watch.

Rhekett 04/24/10 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

[quote] Shirlox : she even stole money from me, ... And then in Jr.High, she knew my locker comb, and with another best friend of mine, went into it, telling my 2nd one that I allow her to take as much money from my wallet anytime, luckily I had all my money on me that day. [/quote] This i don't understand. =/

My Characters: Rhekett - 168 Broa I/L Arch Mage

Bobishness 04/24/10 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

Leave your friend, you're only going to hurt yourself.

My Characters: Infiuental - 36 Scania Page

Shirlox 04/24/10 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

[quote] Rhekett : This i don't understand. =/ [/quote] LOL, so I had two best friends. The liar and the one following the liar. A = Liar , B = Other A and B went to my locker, and knowing my combination, Liar told B That I told Liar, that Liar was allowed to go into my wallet and take whatever money she wanted. O__O LOL I wonder if I made that more confusing LOLOL The stealing money part didn't happen that day. Lets just say, she knew my combo, and went to my locker, planning to take money from me, since I told her she was "allowed" to (which was a lie) but I never had money in my locker that day. LOL

My Characters: shiriox - 80 Scania Hermit