I have a really important race coming up and I need help

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thread starter mvpshaq32 May 16 2009 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

So our team is composed of 4 guys while the other team is composed of 3 guys and 1 girl. The girl is the fastest of their team while I'm the fastest of mine so we are set to go head to head. The problem is that she's the heavy favorite and I really want to win this for my team. So I asked my coach for steroids, but he laughed at me and bent me over and slapped me around in the locker room. So I tried to figure out a way to improve my time and I even did what those swimmers do and I shaved my body hair and my legs. Still on a test run, my time improved a little bit, but not significantly enough to challenge the girl's time. Then a crazy idea came to me and I thought what do boys have that girls don't have? And I looked down and thought AHA! this is what is slowing me down. With no other options left, I'm thinking about cutting one or both of my nuts off and I really think my time will improve enough to beat the girl. So is this a good idea?

BeraRules 05/16/09 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

I love trolls!

ICantKs 05/16/09 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

Film it and submit it to the BME PAIN OLYMPICS,

VMIT 05/16/09 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

finish her

magicmage6 05/16/09 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

Asked for steroids? ... You lost me there.

ClementZ 05/16/09 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

VMIT said: " finish her " Much better than destroying your genitals.

Kyeh 05/16/09 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

No, it's not ur balls, she's got weight in front helping her go faster! (boobs) So you need to grow boobs

VMIT 05/16/09 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

ClementZ said: " Much better than destroying your genitals." yeah the funny thing is this could be actualy considered in his weird troll logic

OhMiOhMai 05/16/09 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

yes this works miracles but for best results do it right before the race starts, that way you will also have much less blood slowing you down. blood is very heavy.

mvpshaq32 05/16/09 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

What's troll? Is that a drug that I can slip to the girl to make her go slower?

originaldude 05/16/09 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

Okay, I lol'd A++, would read again.

VMIT May 16 2009 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

mvpshaq32 said: "What's troll? Is that a drug that I can slip to the girl to make her go slower?" yeah that's exactly what it is

mvpshaq32 05/16/09 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

VMIT said: " yeah that's exactly what it is" Can you email me some?

nuST 05/16/09 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

What I find funny is that apparently TS thinks all girls have p3n1535. (Seriously? This word is blocked? Stupid.)

VMIT 05/16/09 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

mvpshaq32 said: " Can you email me some?" it's easy just go to black forrest search for monster that look like humans cut some of it's hair off and put it in her food