Questions for the fairer basilers.

basilmarket.com forums : Chat | 16 posts archived

thread starter shroomsly Apr 12 2009 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

Alright, I don't usually come to you guys when I'm confused in this area, but regardless: I can imagine you all have some expertise in the area. Scenario: I went on a date tonight and had a terrific time, but nothing happened; just some giggles and handholding, not even a kiss. It was like I went on a date with my cousin or something. :X My date has never dated anyone before me, and we're both 17, so she's never done any of the things that I've done or experienced the steps in relationships like... first kiss, base, sex, the like. Why is there such a big stigma against affection here? I don't want to force anything on her, of course, but I just can't understand what is going on. Anyways, what do I want from you guys? Well, I know that there's a palpable group of girls who have never dated anyone here, so I guess I'm sending this to you and other girls; What do you expect from the first guy you've dated? When did you start being affectionate? I'm straining to understand this. Mind you, I don't want advice, per se, but I just want to know what you guys experienced here, because I'm at a total loss. x_x

616510509 04/12/09 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

If I were her, it's because I'm scared. This works because I never dated either, so that would probably be how I'd take my first few steps.

yayo150 04/12/09 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

Well man, she's never dated anyone before you. She's probably nervous. Just ask her out again and when the time is right, things will happen. Just don't give up!

isayhi 04/12/09 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

Dude, just tell her your a mod on basilmarket and say, "If you don't kiss me by the next date, I will perma. ban your account!" She will feel threatened and then that is when you make your move.

shroomsly Apr 12 2009 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

COChaos said: "All the best, Shroomsly." Aye, thanks. 616510509 said: "If I were her, it's because I'm scared. This works because I never dated either, so that would probably be how I'd take my first few steps." Alright then, from your perspective, (I've pretty much lost faith in my decisions at this point, lol...) What would be a safe, yet intimate environment where she'd feel okay with a closer date? @Above: Ahh, yes... Totally forgot to play that card... (O_O)

DreamSavior8 04/12/09 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

just act the way u do and eventually it will all fall into place(or not if it doesnt sorry for misleadin u dude)

DevilOfRoses 04/12/09 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

Some girls are really really conservative or really cautious about their first kiss. I mean, some of my friends didn't kiss their boyfriends for like at least a month (even more for some). If you really can't handle not having the physical part of a relationship, I don't suggest you dating a girl who's never dated before :P

dexlesh0b0 04/12/09 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

If she's a conservative type, she won't kiss till marriage. (very rare nowadays :X) Anyhow, it's her first time dating. It took five dates for me to get a peck on the cheek. I fail. No, I don't fail. I think. Anyhows, give it time, good easy environments include: Outdoor places with things to distract you, ie: zoos, parks, etc : Gives you something to be distracted about. After the atmosphere seems right, find a more secluded area. :x Movies: Gives you something to concentrate on so you don't have to talk, and they give you a nice dark atmosphere. :x Avoid theme parks cuz of the long lines unless you're chatty. .__. I failed on the last one.

shroomsly 04/12/09 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

DevilOfRoses said: "Some girls are really really conservative or really cautious about their first kiss. I mean, some of my friends didn't kiss their boyfriends for like at least a month (even more for some). If you really can't handle not having the physical part of a relationship, I don't suggest you dating a girl who's never dated before :P" Well, I'm not exactly gonna turn back. xD I really like this girl and I'd rather not give up on her; I just don't know what I should consider as 'unreasonable waiting time.' x_x

DevilOfRoses 04/12/09 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

shroomsly said: " Well, I'm not exactly gonna turn back. xD I really like this girl and I'd rather not give up on her; I just don't know what I should consider as 'unreasonable waiting time.' x_x" I think a lot of girls' minds work like this: if you love her, you'll wait for her. So yeah, I really have no idea what to do about that ;[ Maybe just show her a lot of affection and she'll give in :]

cupc4ke 04/12/09 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

I think she's just nervous. So like, my ex boyfriend and I..even before we started dating, we took naps together in each others' dorms. But even after 2 weeks of sleeping together, when he tried to kiss me, I was scared as hell lololol I look back and I'm like.. Wow, I'm so dumb. We were 17 at the time too and I also had never kissed anyone. On his first attempt, I kinda stopped him. Then, he tried to kiss me like 4 days later and I just went along with it. ;3

shroomsly Apr 12 2009 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

DevilOfRoses said: " I think a lot of girls' minds work like this: if you love her, you'll wait for her. So yeah, I really have no idea what to do about that ;[ Maybe just show her a lot of affection and she'll give in :]" Alright... but I'm not writing a sonnet, I just can't understand how you girls think; I guess I'll be waiting around for a while and I'll just give it some time. @Cupc4ke: Awwww... gah, too cutesy. xD

MistahDrunk 04/12/09 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

If she doesn't do anything, and you don't do anything, it's gonna go downhill.

isayhi 04/12/09 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

shroomsly said: " Aye, thanks. Alright then, from your perspective, (I've pretty much lost faith in my decisions at this point, lol...) What would be a safe, yet intimate environment where she'd feel okay with a closer date? @Above: Ahh, yes... Totally forgot to play that card... (O_O)" See, don't forgot your power.

shroomsly 04/12/09 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

MistahDrunk said: "If she doesn't do anything, and you don't do anything, it's gonna go downhill." Pretty much my worst fear. ...Thanks.

MistahDrunk 04/12/09 + PM | QUOTE | PERMALINK | REPORT

shroomsly said: " Pretty much my worst fear. ...Thanks. " Cheer up, give her some time. Sooner or later someone has to make a move.